Episode 9 • Friendship
Be like chalk and cheese
Have (your) ups and downs
Talk behind someone's back
Max and I started talking only because we were lab partners in chemistry class. Nobody could imagine we’d become friends. We were like chalk and cheese. Max liked movies, I liked reading. He liked going out, I was shy and preferred to stay at home. However, we began spending more and more time together and became good friends. We had our ups and downs, sometimes we would have small fights but in the end we would always make up. On the last day of school, however, I heard him talking to a friend and saying ‘Don’t tell Tracy’. I couldn’t believe it! I thought we were best friends! I immediately confronted him and we had a huge falling-out. I accused him of talking behind my back but he kept denying it. We didn’t speak for weeks. Well, until I received a letter. Yep, an actual letter. It was from him. I opened it and it read ’Tracy, will you go on a date with me?’. So that’s what the big secret was! From that moment on we’ve been much more than just good friends.
Just good friends. It's time to take a look at today's expressions.
Be like chalk and cheese
'We were like chalk and cheese.'
• If two people are like chalk and cheese, are they similar or different?
If two people are like chalk and cheese, they are very, very different.
• If two people are like chalk and cheese, what’s different? Their personality or their looks?
If two people are like chalk and cheese, it is their personality that's very, very different.
• You and who else are like chalk and cheese?
I'm going to say that there are many people that I'm friends with that are very different from me. In a lot of ways, I think me and my mom are like chalk and cheese. We have a very different view on life and we have pretty different lifestyles. Other than that, I tend to surround me to surround myself with people that, I don't know, are kind of like me.
Have (your) ups and downs
'We had our ups and downs.'
• If a friendship has its ups and downs, do only good things happen, only bad or a mixture or both good and bad things?
You have your ups, you have your downs, which means both good and bad things happen in the relationship or in the friendship.
• Do you think it’s normal for a friendship to have its ups and downs?
I think, it isn't. I think it's more normal in maybe a romantic relationship because you spend so much time together and you have maybe different expectations, but at least for me, when I'm friends with someone, we don't really have any ups and downs. The relationship is pretty stable.
'In the end we would always make up.'
• When do you make up with someone? Before or after having an argument?
Here's the order, you have an argument and then you make up.
• Do you go back to being friendly after making up?
Yes. Here's the order again, you have an argument, you make up and that's why you become friendly again.
• What things can be done when making up with someone? Shaking hands, waving your hand or hugging?
You have more than one option actually. If you're making up with someone, you normally hug someone, maybe if you're very intimate with them or shaking hands. Shaking hands is very popular in a lot of cultures after having an argument to make up by shaking hands. Waving, not so much.
• How long after a fight do you usually make up?
Does it take you a long time to make up? It never takes me a long time. I hate arguing. Usually, the moment I have a fight, like right after the fights over, I immediately try to make up with a person because it just, I cannot stand being mad at someone or knowing that someone's mad at me.
'We had a huge falling-out.'
• Why could you have a falling-out? Is it because you agree or disagree with someone?
Well, a falling-out usually happens because there's a disagreement.
• Is the disagreement big or small?
The disagreement is big. Something bad has happened for two people to fall out, for two people to have a falling-out.
• Are you still friendly with someone you had a falling-out with?
Unfortunately, no. If you've had a falling-out with someone, then you'd stopped being friends with them, at least temporarily.
• Have you ever had a falling-out with someone? Why?
Yes. I've had my fair share of falling-outs in my life. I think the biggest ones, or I should say, the longest ones have been with my mom. Sometimes we get into fights and we wouldn't speak for weeks. Well, maybe not weeks but days, definitely.
Talking behind someone’s back
'I accused him of talking behind my back.'
• If you talk behind someone’s back, does that person know you’re talking about them?
Nope. This person has no idea you're talking about them because you're doing it behind their back. Not literally, just without them knowing that you're talking about them.
• If you talk behind someone’s back, do you say good or bad things about this person?
If you're using the expression to talk behind someone's back, it means that the person talking is not saying good things about you. It's usually bad things.
• Is it a good thing to talk behind someone’s back?
Well, no, obviously not. It's terrible. Don't do it. Just be honest. Be direct. Talk to the people that you want to talk to.
• What would you do if you discovered that a friend is talking behind your back?
I would stop being friends with them, like for sure. There would be no way for me to keep being friends with someone that I can't fully trust.
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